My computer pinged as an email entered my inbox notifying me that I had a message on an online dating site. I logged into the site and was pleasantly surprised at what I found.
He was 43, looked fairly fit, appeared to be self sufficient and sounded relatively interesting. This had to be worth a try. After a while internet dating has a tendency to become a bit of a drag, it is hard to sort the wheat from the chaff and most emails I get go straight into the delete box.
A few emails later telephone numbers were exchanged and he was soon on the phone. Our first conversation went well. I liked how he sounded and we chatted easily for a good while. In our next conversation he was a little full on, a bit too eager for my liking and I found myself telling him he needed to calm down or he would frighten me off. I was still interested but was beginning to feel cautious, he talked a lot and it didn’t appear to be down to nerves. However, he was new to the ‘scene’ so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and decided he was just over eager.
We met for coffee and I was relieved to find that he didn’t give me any psycho vibes. He was quite relaxed and we quite quickly got into conversation. It wasn’t long before I realised that we weren’t compatible. I’m not sure if it was that he thought he should get a tax break for privately educating his child and having private healthcare or because towards the end of our second coffee he still didn’t know anything about me, but the signs were growing! I asked him about an emblem on his top and he looked at me disparagingly and said “I’m clad head to toe in Vivienne Westwood”. If I had any doubt that put it too bed and I knew that there would be no second date with this fella.
To be fair the date wasn’t boring like many I’ve been on. We did in fact have quite stimulating conversation as I challenged his views but nothing had prepared me for his next clanger. He was telling me about the sport he participates in and said that he loved his food and put on weight easily so it was important to him to get in lots of exercise to prevent this. He then said he was very annoyed with obese people, he couldn’t understand how they could let themselves get that way. He questioned why they didn’t reach a point where they could see they were getting to an unacceptable weight and do something about it. I suggested that obesity was a complex issue and there might be many reasons why a person had become overweight and struggle to lose it. He didn’t acknowledge this and went on to moan a bit more about obesity, finally declaring “and to top it all it’s our hard earned tax payers money that ends up having to foot the medical bills for their greed”. It was all I could do not to choke on my latte, not quite believing what I was hearing.
I challenged his views, asked him if he felt the same way about people who drank and smoked, or people who received cancer treatment when the cancer was caused by lifestyle choice. He wasn’t able to make the comparison. It was quite obvious to me at this point that there was no more to be said, the date was over. We left the coffee shop and I thanked him for the date and said I was off to get a bus home.
He indignantly exclaimed that he would take it from that I wasn’t interested in pursuing things further. I asked him how he thought things had gone and he said that he thought it had gone well and he knew that he was happy to take things further. I laughed and said that part of the difficulty was that it was all about him, I wasn’t sure how much he really knew about me because he hadn’t actually taken any interest in me. He said he knew that I liked to argue and that he wanted to kiss me. Before I realised what was happening he had moved in for the kiss and would you believe he was a ‘slobber’, the worse I had experienced for some time. It was revolting, like someone drooling into my mouth.
I pushed him away from me and asked him what he thought he was doing. Without waiting for an answer I declared that I was one of those fat people he really hated who put a burden on the NHS by having weight loss surgery and I was off to get my bus. I turned on my heel and didn’t look back, pleased to find the bus was there for me to get straight on to.
So it’s back to the dating sites and single events to continue the search for someone; and in the meantime scrabble friend is coming up at the w.e to play and that’s good enough for now!