I have a friend who gets upset if I forget to send a card for her birthday or other significant event. I’ve explained that the fact I make the effort to come out and visit her on her birthday, celebrate the day with her, should tell her that I love her, not a card. Why is it that so much significance is put onto something designed to make the fat cats fatter?
I really struggle with day’s identified to celebrate certain events or concepts. It seems so fake to do things just because the day dictates we do. I much prefer to offer expressions of love to the people I care about in ways that are meaningful and come from the heart. I have always struggled buying presents because I’m expected to, rather than because I’ve seen something that I know someone will love and so I get it for them. Receiving a spontaneous gift is the most wonderfully rewarding experience both for the giver and the receiver.
So, today is Valentine’s Day, in case it had escaped anyone’s notice! As a young person the pressure to receive a card or some gesture from someone known or unknown was immense. It is a hidden pressure, a feeling that everyone else is loved, that because you haven’t received anything you are in fact unlovable. The beauty of aging is the understanding that nothing is quite as it seems and most people are riddled with the same insecurities as yourself! It is the knowledge we acquire with age that makes life easier to bear as we judge ourselves less against others and start trying to enjoy the life we have; because it could all be over tomorrow.
I know valentines is just the commercial exploitation of the sentiment of love. I don’t ever want to subscribe to it, enter into the spirit of it or waste my time and energy on it! That said, when scrabble friend sent a text saying Happy Valentines, my inner child was smiling broadly for a good few minutes!